My First Critical Theory ABC (4)

By: Greg Rowland
September 12, 2012

Comrades! I present you with a radical counter-blast to the pervasive neo-fascism of the play group, a seven-day series of Critical Theory poems — radical quatrains that will enable children to challenge the dehumanising practices of the Kindergarten Konvention. Read this opus to your children, denounce parents who do not do so, and above all campaign, by any means necessary, for its print publication.

‘L’ for Lacan, a fun-loving half-joker
Said words made up people, and not vice versa,
And he said you should do whatever you like…
So go kiss a zebra and call everyone ‘Mike’.

‘M’ is for Marx, an old guy with a beard
Got people with money alarmed and a-feared.
Karl said nutty stuff like “Rich people should share!”
But rich folk didn’t like it. They all shouted “Not Fair!”

‘N’ is for Nietzsche: smart, funny, good/bad and maybe quite mad,
Fred thought up an odd kind of Space-Cosmic-Dad.
Thus featured his Preacher, his Big-Sky-Magic-Creature —
So it’s hard to get Nietzsche, he’s a super-weird teacher.



A series of seven posts, written by Greg Rowland and illustrated by Joe Alterio.

Joe Alterio is an illustrator, animator, comic creator, and artist interested in narrative structure, interactive creativity, and the physical manifestations of story-telling. See more at


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