By: P.G. Wodehouse

“Did someone steal Lady Constance’s necklace tonight?”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“Ladies and gentlemen, I think the lights have gone out.”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“Are you really choosing this moment to — to propose to me?”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“Of course,” argued Mr. Keeble, “it isn’t really stealing.”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“Oh, thinking?” said Freddie, impressed. “Right-ho!”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“You’re dashed hard on a fellow,” said Freddie.

By: P.G. Wodehouse

A damp face with twigs sticking to it was protruding from a nearby yew.

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“You persist in the delusion that my name is William.”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“I’d like to knock you for a goal!”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“When it comes to doping out a scheme, you’re the snake’s eyebrows!”

By: Joshua Glenn

“We must always distinguish between the unlikely and the impossible.”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“My name’s McTodd — Ralston McTodd.”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

“It seems to me the nearest thing to slavery that I have ever struck.”

By: Joshua Glenn

“Don’t talk so much! I never met a fellow like you for talking.”

By: P.G. Wodehouse

‘I have only just found out your name, Mr. McTodd.’