Victor Ludi (1): Rhyming Slang

By: Patrick Cates
March 22, 2010

The launch of the inaugural Magister Ludi challenge just over a week ago was met with a frenetic back-and-forth of poetic patois. Riffs were played, borrowed, combined, repackaged, rhymed and recombined, and the challenge threatened to get sucked into a wonderful vernacular vortex (or, to put it another way, disappear up its own comedic Khyber).

But the challenge came to an end last night. And now, after lengthy pondering, I have reached a decision on a winning entry. It was the first and, despite the deluge of splendid rhymery that followed it, it remained the most elegant of all. Culturally relevant, severally layered and eminently usable, “Lindsay Lohan = clone” wins Tom Nealon a HiLobrow t-shirt and the honour of being crowned the first ever Victor Ludi.

Here was Tom’s entry in full:

Lindsay Lohan=Clone

“I was going to give Bob the combination to the gun cabinet, but I’m afraid he might be a Lindsay.”


It’s going to become increasingly important to discuss whether someone is a clone without them realizing what you’re saying – this could save lives.

Bene factum, Tom.


Codebreaking, Haw-Haw